National Update - Nats Bounce Back, Split Series with Braves

And after the weekend, we are right back where we started. The Nats split this weekend with the Braves, dropping the first two and giving the Braves hope that they would lead the division once this series concluded.

The Nats had other ideas, coming back over the weekend and letting them know who's in charge. They regain the 1.5 game lead over the Braves and immediately fly out to Milwaukee (47-30) for a three game series, followed by a four game series against the Cubs (31-42).

Series Recap:

Some takeaways from this series:

Four or More to Seal the Door
As Michael Smith would say, "The number for the Nationals is 4!" The Nationals are officially 33-3 when scoring 4+ runs, and 6-32 in the games they fail to score 4+ runs. Not to mention that all three of the 4+ run losses are in extra innings, one coming this weekend after the Rendon bomb in the bottom of the ninth. While 4 is somewhat the magic number for all teams in the majors, this is a true credit to the Nationals pitching staff. Still holding on to the second best team ERA, and best bullpen ERA in the major leagues, the Nattys need to be able to take advantage of that when at the plate. The Nats are middle of the pack in terms of runs scored per game (4.05). If they can even up that by half a run, that jumps them up 10 spots, and puts them basically in the drivers seat in the division. The Marlins are the only team in the division with a higher RPG (4.35) while the Braves are 29th in the league (3.57).

Rollin Rollin Rendon
Anthony Michael Rendon must be butter, because the kid is on a fucking roll as of late. While he only hit 9-25 in this homestand, it's somewhat skewed by the 1-6 day in which he tied the game in the 9th with a two run bomb. Of the 11 runs the Nats scored this weekend against the Braves, he accounted for 6 of them. He's really coming into his own after being put into the starting line-up at 3B while Zimmerman plays in LF. Plus, you can basically put him anywhere in the infield, and will likely move back to 2B when Harper returns and Zimm goes back to third. Rendon is second in the team in home runs and RBI's only behind Ian Desmond. With those two up the middle, the youth movement that is the Nationals continues to look promising.

K - Thats Not Good
To continue with the talk about the offense, the Nationals are striking out A LOT. Braves pitching were dialed in this weekend, at times making the Nats look silly at the plate. Minor (11), Teheran (10), Santana (9), Floyd (6), Jaime (3), Kimbrel (2), Varvaro (1), Avilan (1), Buchter (1), Walden (1). Of the 120 outs the Braves recorded, the Nats struck out for 45 of them. Thats 38% of their outs coming without even putting the ball in play, which is 38% more than I'd like it to be. Jayson Werth and Ian Desmond lead the charge this weekend with 10 K's a piece and both going 2-16. With Desmond as the leader in HR and RBIs for the club, he can't be killing himself at the dish. Sometimes it feels like he's up there to crush the ball, when all he needs to do it put the ball in play, he's an asset on the bases as well. Jayson's been in the middle of a cold streak, and needs to channel the beard magic and heat up again. Can't have the 3-spot turn into an automatic out in the line-up. He just needs to loosen up a bit, a la 2013:

Werth definitely rages, even at the ripe age of 35. Pretty sure he was at PCBSB '14 in between Spring Training games, just crushing Nattys (of course) with frat stars everywhere. I wish Werth could wear this every at-bat. 0 fucks given. That for sure would break the slump.

The series against Milwaukee should be a great test for the Nationals, as the Brewers are starting to pull away in the NL Central. Gio Gonzalez (3-4) looks to rebound from his last outing against the always colorful Matt Garza (4-4) tonight for game one of three.

In other news get your Potomac Nats tickets for tonight! Harper set to make his rehab debut.

RENDONER BONERS! The Game is Tied!

Rendon swooping in for the low-five on Captain Grizz after his game-tying home run in the ninth

Watch MLB Video here

Clutch city! Kimbrel throwing on back to back nights, Nats needing to hit the four run plateau, two outs, and Rendon steps up to the dish. What does he do? Cranks a fucking laser to left centerfield. Umps review it to cue the Rendoner Boners, but it's not even close! I've got a Rendoner Boner, the stadium has Rendoner Boners, and Craig Kimbrel just went big time flaccid. Love it so much. Can't even imagine what corny bullshit F.P. came up with,  but at this point, I don't even care. To extras we go!

Finally Found Something I Like About F.P. Santangelo

I will officially go on the record and say that I love the Nationals, but I despise listening to F.P. Santangelo while watching the game. Convinced myself that F.P. stands for fucking pussy. I get that he's a former major leaguer and can provide some insight in that regard, but the dude was mediocre at best. His best stat line as a player was probably in 1996 when he batted .277, hit 5 HRs and had 56 RBIs in 152 games. Nothing to brag about. But when he broadcasts he does two things that just really steam my dumplings.

1. I feel like he think's he's the kid that doesn't study for the test, gets an A and brags about it. You can just feel the arrogance sometimes when he's broadcasting, the "I've been there before" attitude, like it provides any additional value or credibility to what he's saying. Maybe if you had a decent career I would value your major league insight, but until you can flash back to the late 1990s and hit the roids harder than you did, don't see it happening.

2. I feel at other times, he's the Dane Cook of commentary. I also hate Dane Cook, he was never really that funny, he just says his punchlines in three different tones of voice, and that got a huge stir. He basically told a story and over simplified it for us. That's what I feel like F.P. does also. Not to mention his insufferable catch phrases:

-"Tater"
-"Knock" 
-"'ts good stuff!/I love it!"
-"raking it"
-"plays the game the right way" 
-"center-cut" 
-"features" (for the types of pitches a pitcher THROWS)
-"offer" (commonly referred to as "swing" or check swing)
- pronouncing any word that begins with "str" as "shtr"

There's nothing original there. If you're going to give me vanilla ice cream, it better be the best vanilla ice cream i've ever had, and he is not. He sucks. Period. As annoying as I think F.P. Santangelo is, I think I finally discovered something that I like about him. 

Meet Michelle McLaughlin aka Ms. F.P. Santangelo:

NSFW Pics Here!

I will still continue to call him Fucking Pussy Santangelo, especially if he's living up to his name in and out of the broadcasting booth.

National Update - Nats Sweep Two Game Series Against Stros

Daps! Daps for everyone!

In this 2-game series with the Astros, the Nats went 2-0, taking both games with a score 6-5.

Game 1 - Nats Narrowly Escape Clippard Clipping Himself

Astros pitcher Dallas Keuchel came into this game hot, winning 6 out of his last 7 starts and boasting a sub-3 ERA. The Nats jumped on him early with two doubles in the first, scoring two and jumping to a 2-0 lead. Zim then ripped his second double of the game in the third, followed by a Desmond single to stretch it to 4-0. Zim has struggled in the last two weeks, only hitting .189 in that span. This game hopefully sparks a turn around, as the Nats can use all the run-support they can get.

Tanner Roark had complete control of this game from the get go. He continues to surprise me, and his curves today looked like Mia Malkova's ass. Beautiful and on-point throughout. He loaded the bases in the 4th, and then doused the rally leaving with only one run earned. He left the game after the 5th, allowing 1 ER and striking out 4. The game remained quiet for the most part until Clippard came in for the 8th and almost blew it. Three straight hits, followed by two Ks, then two more hits accounting for 4 ER in 2/3 of an inning. Clippard had started the season shaky, but has evolved into one of the leagues best set-up men. Hopefully, this was just a glitch in his system. Soriano came did his thing, and got to #Untuck, securing the 6-5 Curly W.

Game 2 - Gio's Return

This was Gio's first start coming back from a month on the DL due to inflammation in his pitching arm. Here's his stat line:

The line on Gio Gonzalez in his return from the disabled list: 5 IP, 5 H, 4 ER, 3 BB, 6 K.
— Washington Nationals (@Nationals) June 19, 2014

Through three innings, Gio was on fire. 1 H, 0 ER, 2 BB, 4 K. He just unraveled in the fourth. Loaded the bases, including a HBP, and then gave up back to back hits, one in which we got to see Zimmerman with a noodle arm in LF (Yikes). You just cant do that, even to the Astros. You take out that inning and he looked exemplary. Just looking for him to regain that confidence and work himself back into last years form. He currently has the highest ERA of the starting rotation.
Down 5-3, the Nats rallied in the bottom of the 7th, with a Rendon blast, Zim RBI and Mclouth sac fly giving the Nattys a 6-5 lead. Clippard bounced back from his implosion last night with a 1-2-3 inning, and Soriano got to #Untuck on back to back nights, again securing the 6-5 Curly W. The Nats stole 5 bases in this game, which I personally love about Matt Williams coaching philosophy, adds so much pressure to the opposing defense. Even if you have to steal bases with ninja like dodging abilities:



One thing that really got under my skin in this game was in the bottom of the 6th. 5-3 game, Espinosa on second with 2 outs, Span hitting. Span laces a ball to right, but assumes its going to be caught, so jogs out of the box. Ball goes over the right fielders head, Span shifts into gear half way up the line. Espinosa easily scores, but Span is thrown out at third on the relay.

If you're Matt Williams you IMMEDIATELY bench Span. Everyone knows the Harper incident earlier this year, where he didn't hustle out a routine ground ball and got benched. How Matt Williams said "this team made an agreement, that when we play the game, that we hustle at all times." This is the exact same thing, he half-assed it out of the box, but instead of a routine ground ball, this was a legitimate sabotage of a base hit and a rally, and you NEVER make the last out at third. I understand the power move it was to bench Harper and have him acknowledge Williams runs the show, but have the stones to follow through with your other players as well. It's hypocritical.

This was a great bounce back for the Nationals after getting swept by the Cards over the weekend. They're slated to have a huge 4-game set against the Braves for the NL East lead. The Braves currently sit 1.5 games back of the Nats, so this series is critical. Jordan Zimmerman takes on Gavin Floyd in the first of the four games. Looking for the Nats to take at least 3/4 and extend their division lead.

Does This Sideshow Bob Look Alike Follow Through with his Streaking Proposal?

My seats! 30k RTs by HT and I'll run on the pitch naked and throw an Arsenal shirt on Alexis Sanchez. pic.twitter.com/vi7zmsrczB
— Arsène's Son (@hughwizzy) June 18, 2014

Don't sweat it people, I'm on it.
— Arsène's Son (@hughwizzy) June 18, 2014

In regards to this tweet, Alexis Sanchez is a star forward for Barcelona in the Spanish League, who is being heavily pursued by multiple clubs in Europe during the next trade deadline. Obviously an Aresnal fan (which is equivalent to liking the Red Sox, except they dont win titles) but I can't respect the move here. Most of these idiots who throw these outlandish proposals on Twitter don't follow through, and are just looking to gain followers and attention. But my real question is, why do you have to run on the field naked to put this shirt on Sanchez? He's got a target, and an objective, which is all you really need. Is running onto the field without clothes significantly more gratifying than doing it fully clothed to warrant the public indecency charges? I guess running out on the field looking like Sideshow Bob isn't enough to make headlines these days. Has to be naked and show off the goods for the world to see. You'd also think that each sideline has about 200 guards on it to prevent shit like this.

This guy has dedicated three tweets to it, so i'm thinking the odds are good that this David Luiz hobo look alike goes through with it. However, with the recent developments in security tackling streakers, I wouldn't do it myself.

And this guy wasn't even looking for a specific player. This guy might get NFL Blitz tackled for trying to approach one of the premier players on the pitch.

UPDATE - That was short lived. Pants are still on too. Not impressed in the slightest.

UPDATE FURTHER - Huge pussy. Just like the rest of them.

I'm not that stupid, people. Thanks to the security guard for playing along. #AudaciousStunt pic.twitter.com/1xhw2SvYdW
— Arsène's Son (@hughwizzy) June 18, 2014

FIFA Cockblocks Beats by Dre, Won't Allow Players to Wear Them at the World Cup

(XXL Mag) - FIFA will not allow any player to wear Beats by Dre headphones inside the stadiums or to media events at the World Cup. FIFA has a licensing agreement with Sony and they do not want any Beats headphones at the tournament. They even went as far to send every player participating in the World Cup a free set of headphones.

I have to admit that this is the first time I watched this commercial, if someone had played this for me about half an hour before the US v. Ghana match, I would have been hyped as shit. The music is perfect, and although Altidore is somewhat subdued in the commerical, it thrives off the anticipation you see in the players and fans faces throughout. AMERICA! BEATS! 

However, Beats are straight garbage. There are two reasons why people like beats: celebrity endorsements and heavy bass. Beats does a great job marketing their product by paying some of the biggest names out there to endorse them such as Lil Wayne, Ellie Goulding and Justin Bieber to name a few. So people are obviously going to jump all over them. But the main reason they're so awful is sound quality. With the increase in popularity of house/EDM/dubstep in the recent years, many younger listeners simply care about bass. Beats do provide a good amount of bass, but that completely ruins the rest of the track. You're not able to hear individual instruments or certain subtleties that an artist might want you to hear. Just sounds like your listening to synthesized bullshit. You can actually get a solid pair of Sony headphones with equal or better quality for almost half the price in some instances. Good for FIFA cockblocking the shit out of Beats. Can't believe i'm siding with FIFA...

From Harper to Harper

Just thinking about taking over the league one stache and goofy haircut at a time.

(WSH Nats) - Nationals left fielder Bryce Harper hit with two hands on Tuesday for the first time since tearing a ligament in his left thumb, manager Matt Williams said. Harper sustained the injury while sliding into third base against the Padres on April 25. Williams said Harper took soft toss in the cage as part of his continuing rehab program, and he hoped to get the slugger on the field in the next few days to evaluate the progress. "It's not full go, and it's not real, full batting practice yet, and you need that," Williams said. "But he's excited about the progression of it moving forward. It won't be long."

Soft toss is only soft toss, but i'll take anything at this point. Harper is obviously the future of the franchise, and all the bandwagon fans want to see him! But more importantly, his return could cause quite a shake up in the line-up. With him returning to LF, Zimmerman will return to his natural position at third, Rendon back to second and Frandsen back on the bench where I enjoy him playing the most. But at the same time, the Nats could take this cocktail and shake it up. If they want to keep Zimmerman in left field, they technically could move Harper to center, where he prefers playing, and deal Span. But I like Span as a lead off hitter, and defensively in center. Regardless of where Harper plays in the field, I need this back in the line-up ASAP. Bring back the Moonfruit farmer.

(WSH Nats) - Pitcher Bryan Harper, Bryce's brother, has been promoted to Double-A Harrisburg from Class A Advanced Potomac, where he went 1-0 with a 2.59 ERA over 31 1/3 innings this season.

Well how bout it big bro?!?! Moving up in the world. Trying to mimic his home run derby camera hat and GoPro! A stache like that needs to be recognized, and apparently it's finally getting the recognition it deserves. Looking at Brian's stat line, he has some quality appearances, 5 of them  just looking for consistency at this point. We'll see how he handles the promotion, but i'm definitely envisioning something like the Braves have with the Upton brothers, except one of them doesn't fucking suck. 

Always appreciate the family dynamic on Twitter. Bryce dishing out the love. 

Congrats to my brother @BryanHarper45 on is promotion to AA @HbgSenators! So excited and ready for him to carve some more! #Lefty #hardwork
— Bryce Harper (@Bharper3407) June 15, 2014